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Successful People: That Not So “Cover Worthy” Truth

Successful People: That Not So “Cover Worthy” Truth

Why your personal definition of success matters

Let’s take a minute to appreciate successful people. By successful people I mean people who have done things right from the get-go. These are people who have been consistent from the first day of middle school when they started being responsible for waking up, getting ready and heading out to catch the bus. These are people who stayed in most nights in varsity instead of grabbing a drink… or 50 a week before the semester tests. These are the people who have only missed the train 10 times in a space of 20 years. We do not spend enough time giving these people attention, we are so focused on fixing, mending and encouraging that we forget these VIPs.

Success is an asshole

Let’s take time to let these people know that their efforts are seen and appreciated. Has this thought ever crossed your mind? I’m sure we all have that friend, sister, uncle, cousin or even parents who are everything we read about in magazines and self-improvement books! Give that person a pat on the shoulder. And no, this is not one of those articles that have a sudden negative twist to it…you can relax now.

But do you know why this is so important? The answer is easy: Success is an asshole! Yep, I said it! And it is echoing in thousands of copies of my latest book, The Change-Maker Mindset – Why Innovation and Change start with an Inner Transformation. These succesful people we look up to have been the greatest embodied form of sacrifice. They still have their schedule in place, still wake up early, eat every meal on time, hit the gym consistently and read all those book pages as if they just developed the habit. They move to new cities and towns where they know not a soul, spent a few Christmases and New Year’s days alone far away from people they care about and love or maybe even lost a chance in love because their spouses would not understand why they work so much.

The truth about successful people

Sometimes what’s seen on the outside as successful might be an anguish on the inside. Not because you hate what you do but because of what that thing has cost you in life. You spent so many years building that all your friends are married and you’re still not ready for a relationship. You and your high school sweetheart have been travelling so much in the last couple of years and working hard in order to achieve those goals you set when you were teens but you haven’t touched each other in 2 years… the perfect love story. Maybe you were too focused on success, you have the perfect spouse who L.O.V.E.S you, a holiday house in the Hampton’s, your spouse’s parent’s cabin somewhere in the woods, children doing well in school and are very well behaved, the latest car models, with both your careers forever on a peak but you are just not happy. Why? The answer is simple: success is an asshole! 

This is not to say there aren’t successful people who have made sacrifices for success that stand happy today, every publication and YouTube video talks about you everyday… calm down! This just goes to show that there is plenty of truth that is normally not so cover friendly; you know that real truth that has to be filtered and cannot be published because it is not completely fitting to the visual direction? There comes a point where these things have to be said, simply to let the people going through them know that we recognize and respect!

It´s the pain that let´s us grow

“So what is your advice now Mr. Change… how do you transform a perfect life?” I can imagine you say. Do you remember that one prayer you made when you were a kid? “Please make my life great, I want my life story to be remembered”. Well, I am not saying stop doing what you have been doing for the past years; that would be a complete waste. I will only say if it is too much that you cannot take your foot out now, then pivot. Find something in this glamorous looking life that actually makes you happy and have it as your point of focus. This will not only remind you of what it feels to be REALLY happy, but it will help you appreciate everything and everyone around you. This is where you learn to love if you hadn’t given yourself time to do that. When you’re truly happy loving becomes easy. You get to realize how much you’re appreciated in all these things that give you anguish and start to see how important and loved you are.

It is in these moments that your character gets shaped. The dissatisfaction, defeat or frustration can be extremely powerful sources of motivation. Do what works for you!

Best wishes and let the change begin

signature ilja grzeskowitz

 

 

 

 

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